GODLY PRINCIPLES FOR MARITAL BONDING (4)

After I asked out Irewamiri, she had a unique, broad daylight encounter. She was in her room. She seems to have dozed off a bit when she caught a vision:

A dear father we both loved walked up to her and said, “I have called you to help my son in what I have sent him to do.” The dear father walked out of her room, and she became fully conscious. She did not forget that encounter.

Truly, we have come to the junction that what has kept us is the conviction of what the Lord said to her. We have made tough decisions and aligned perfectly on it because something fundamental was settled- Help him in what I have called him to do. What a help she has been- stable, strong and solid.

One of the things that affects marital bonding is the selfishness of the parties involved. There is a seed of suspicion that has been sown in many lives called, “Won’t I have my own? Won’t I make a name for myself? What happens to my own dreams?” Selfishness has benched sacrifice. Now, confusion has become king.

Marriage requires selflessness, not selfishness:

Genesis 2:24 TPT
[24] For this reason, a man leaves his father and his mother to be unselfishly attached to his wife. They become one flesh as a new family!

If you will be a great help, you must be ready to live a life of sacrifice. There are times you would have to let go of a desire because of the demands of the season. There are times you will turn down a job offer in the interest of the family. Let sacrifice guide your union.

I stood with a dear mother a while back in Eruwa and asked her, “Ma, what was going through your mind when you followed Daddy to Eruwa?” Her response was simple: “A lot of people tried to discourage me. Even his friends came and said that I should fight his decision and refuse, maybe, he would change his mind, but I told them, I am going with him anywhere he goes.” That decision led to a great couple team that built a great institution that would soon be forty years old.

Someone is saying, “Men are not that reliable. I know how my Dad treated my mum.” Another voice is saying, “I know my wife, it is better I focus on building my dream without her.” Will you allow hurt to lead your life and decisions, or would you trust the word of the Lord?

If your reference is experience and not the Word, then the foundation is faulty already. But when your reference is the Word, you are both built for a great marriage in love and unity. Please, let the Word heal your heart.

If you are the loving wife of a hurting man, it is tough work. If you are the loving husband of a hurting wife, it is tough work too. Be patient with your spouse. There is good hidden in that mess.

There is no home built on the rock of God’s word that does not stand the test of time. Any marriage built on selfish interest will sink in the midst of storms.

© temilOluwa Ola, Eruwa.

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