DISTRACTION CAN “STEAL” YOUR SPOUSE
At the early stage of our marriage, I was the phone presser. I would return from work and get on my phone, responding to messages and chatting with others. I neglected the wife God gave me to nurture. One day, she had said something thrice, and I did not hear her once. She left me to myself. I only saw the reaction.
Later in marriage, as I mastered this, I would not even pick up a call when I am talking with her. If I have to, I will seek her permission to pick up the call.
There are also times I am talking with her and she is pressing her phone, I would pause and then tell her, “Communication requires Eye Contact too” (Oju l’oro wa). She would apologize or ask for a minute and then give her full attention.
We devised our own little rule- “Honour has and gives attention” (If you honour me, you will give me attention).
Giving attention to your spouse and having your spouse’s attention should be a major goal for you. Anything that wants to steal your attention from your spouse should be treated as an evil intruder. The consequences of stolen attention are always very grievous. Refuse to be distracted. Let your spouse have your eyes, ears and all.
When the serpent stole Eve’s attention, it blossomed into a friendship with terrible consequences. How did I know they were friends? The judgment of God was clear:
Genesis 3:15 ICB
I will make you and the woman enemies to each other. Your descendants and her descendants will be enemies. Her child will crush your head. And you will bite his heel.”
Before God made them enemies, what were they? Friends definitely!
Refuse to be distracted. Do you still notice when your wife is troubled? Do you notice when your husband is stressed? Do you notice when your spouse tosses and turns all night? Did you wake up beside a woman who cried all night, and you are unaware? Do you notice the little things they do to appreciate you, or has it become the norm?
When you are distracted, you lose things entrusted to your hands.
I Kings 20:39-40 NKJV
[39] Now as the king passed by, he cried out to the king and said, “Your servant went out into the midst of the battle; and there, a man came over and brought a man to me, and said, ‘Guard this man; if by any means he is missing, your life shall be for his life, or else you shall pay a talent of silver.’ [40] While your servant was busy here and there, he was gone.”Then the king of Israel said to him, “So shall your judgment be; you yourself have decided it.”
There are people living with spouses whom they do not know. They are totally lost in themselves that they cannot see what is going on. Listen, what if the answer you need to build that strong home is to give each other a little more attention?
What will your marriage look like if you begin to prioritize your spouse again and give them the attention they deserve?
Take care of your garden. The serpent is seeking to break in. Guard it before you lose it.
© temilOluwa Ola, Eruwa
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