COMPLIMENTS ARE SCARCE. REFUSE TO BE AN AMBASSADOR OF ANGER

Years ago, we were celebrating the birthday of a dear aunt of mine. She happens to be in the top-level management of a multinational. We were having dinner in a Chinese restaurant for just a few friends, colleagues and family.

In between the great talks, banters and meal, I noticed a middle-aged man who must be in his early 40s. I could not take my eyes off him. He was so calm, cool and composed. He had this amazing aura around him. When there was some space for interaction, I walked up to him and shared a compliment about what I admired about him.

His face lit up and he made one of the most surprising statements I have ever heard: “Thank you. No one has ever complimented me that before”. He went ahead to share some more unsolicited information about himself. He was simply grateful.

At another time, I walked into a bank and the man that would attend to me had a tired and angry face. I wrote him a note saying, “I know it has been a busy day. Well done. Thank you for all you do”. He smiled and the atmosphere changed instantly.

I want to ask you today to be an ambassador of great compliments. A lot is happening around us and it is so easy to get into negative vibes. The anger level is almost palpable. People are tensed and if care is not taken, they are close to displaying destructive tendencies.

There are things you must therefore be armed with in such a time as this:

1. Gentle Answers: A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.
(Proverbs 15:1 NLT). It could be a bit hard without the Spirit of God, but then it is possible to respond with gentle answers no matter what. Anger is always looking for more ambassadors. Refuse to accept its ambassadorial deal.

2. Be Quick to Hear but Slow to Speak: Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. (James 1:19 NLT) A little moment of silence to process what has been said before responding can be all you need to extend love rather than anger.

3. Overlook Wrongs: Sensible people control their temper; they earn respect by overlooking wrongs (Proverbs 19:11 NLT). People will surely offend you but you refuse to be offended. Overlook wrongs.

4. Don’t befriend angry people: Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul. Proverbs 22:24‭-‬25 NLT

5. Be at peace with all men. Avoid A Fight: Avoiding a fight is a mark of honour; only fools insist on quarrelling. (Proverbs 20:3 NLT)

Deflate anger. Genuinely lookout for what you can compliment in others., even if it is your spouse. Refuse anger. Embrace compliments. Compliments are scarce. Give them.

temilOluwa Ola, Eruwa