CLASSIC SERIES: COUNSEL FOR YOUNG HUSBANDS (3)

The night I proposed to my beloved wife and she told me “No” for quite some reasons. As the reasons began to roll in, I perceived God speaking to me: “I have placed my daughter in your hands because I know you will not break her again”. God hinted to me about things that she would do and become. I […]

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CLASSIC SERIES: COUNSEL FOR YOUNG HUSBANDS (2)

Just a few weeks after our honeymoon, I came home that evening to a slightly moody wife- one-word answers and feigned smiles. I could not remember us having any fight earlier. I asked questions upon questions but got no answer. For about two hours, she just wanted to be on her own. When at last she would speak, she told […]

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CLASSIC SERIES: COUNSEL FOR YOUNG HUSBANDS (1)

Amid our disagreement that day, I wondered why such a minor issue could bring about such huge reactions. (Some responses you get at times go deeper than the issue itself. Men must learn to listen to what has not been said also until your wife masters the art of expressing herself). I was concerned. I called our mentor and narrated […]

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HONOUR YOUR IN-LAWS

On the journey to marriage, we had to embark on family visits. There were quite some opposing voices already. They had legitimate fears about our intention to get married. In the heat of it, we visited an elderly one. He did not mince words when he said to me, “Are you sure you will not be a liability to your […]

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BEFORE YOU CONCLUDE THAT YOUR SPOUSE IS LAZY

I already had a long-running debate with the Holy Spirit about marrying Irewamiri. I already had enough head knowledge as her pastor to place her in a box. I saw her skip services. I knew she did not like anything ministry. She was not even baptised in the Holy Ghost like some of us. To crown it all, we were […]

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ONE QUESTION THAT CAN REVEAL A VISIONLESS SPOUSE

The fact that I was pastoring full time and resided in a place unknown to some of my prospective in-laws raised many concerns. It was a red flag for them. I did not have an easy ride to marriage. One of her elder brothers eventually agreed to see me. We met in a restaurant in one of the high brow […]

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FAVOUR IS NOT JUST ABOUT YOUR WEDDING; IT IS ABOUT YOUR MARRIAGE

A young family was spending some time with us that morning, and we got into a conversation about their home. As we were about to end the conversation, I had a prompt to say to them, “The favour you enjoyed was not because you wanted to get married. People were not giving you gifts because it was your wedding day. […]

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OUR SEX LIFE AS A COUPLE IS A MESS. CAN WE WATCH PORNOGRAPHY?

A young couple was spending some time with us. While interacting with them, we began to probe and ask questions about their union and especially their sexual bond as a young couple. We shared tips and educated them about things that will help their sexual bond and the actual act itself. At one point, we mentioned that pornography was not […]

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OUR PARENTS ARE INTRUDING IN OUR MARITAL SPACE; WHAT DO WE DO?

Some weeks after we had our first baby, I was still a few hours from the end of my working hours. Irewamiri called and asked me, “Darling, when are you coming home?” It was an unusual call. I could sense the tension in her voice. She must have been under pressure. I asked if all was well. She tried to […]

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BE YOUR SPOUSE’S GREATEST CHEERLEADER

Some years ago, we had a very faulty generator and terrible power supply in the area we lived. One night, some minutes right after the generator repairer left, the generator shut down – it was a season of physical heat, but it was also a season of marital heat. Irewamiri got tired of the situation and of my pastoral response […]

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