THINGS TO SETTLE BEFORE MARRIAGE (6)
When we made up our mind that we would be getting married, we made two important decisions- the first was a question that helped us to engage wisdom. The second was a decision that reduced contention and friction.
The question was simple- “Temi and Ronke, if you will be getting married based on what you have now, what will the wedding look like?”
Friends, do not deceive yourself. I know you have a dream wedding but you cannot use a “daydreaming income” to plan a dream wedding. You should sit down now and ask yourself tough questions. That is why courtship begins with “court”. We examine, cross-examine and re-examine.
Jesus warned us about planning in life: “But don’t begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it? Otherwise, you might complete only the foundation before running out of money, and then everyone would laugh at you.
Luke 14:28-29 NLT
A lot of people conclude the foundation (wedding day) and then run out of money. They become a laughing stock. They had a big wedding but now have a lean pocket and huge liabilities. Do not plan on promises.
The second is a statement that gave us rest. We told ourselves: “We know we will get married. At any point that we run out of money while planning, we would not be pressured until the next supply comes”. We kept to that with all our minds. It got shaky at times but having no principles would make your journey to the wedding day and marriage worse. Principles are rail guards on a cliff. It keeps you away from a huge fall.
As you approach your wedding day, your values will come under test. It will expose the tendencies of the home you are about to build. If you borrow to wed, you will end up borrowing as a family to impress and you will likely not invest. It will reveal if you will be a home driven by emotions and sentiments or by the Word of God and solid principles that will lead to greatness.
Do not be disappointed when those you expect to rise for you do not. You deal with that expectation by planning with what you have and not “expectations that were never spoken”.
May you be blessed with wisdom.
temilOluwa Ola, Eruwa.