May 16, 2022

CLASSIC SERIES: COUNSEL FOR YOUNG HUSBANDS (1)

Amid our disagreement that day, I wondered why such a minor issue could bring about such huge reactions. (Some responses you get at times go deeper than the issue itself. Men must learn to listen to what has not been said also until your wife masters the art of expressing herself). I was concerned. I called our mentor and narrated […]

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0 1 min read
May 15, 2022

HONOUR YOUR IN-LAWS

On the journey to marriage, we had to embark on family visits. There were quite some opposing voices already. They had legitimate fears about our intention to get married. In the heat of it, we visited an elderly one. He did not mince words when he said to me, “Are you sure you will not be a liability to your […]

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0 2 min read
May 14, 2022

BEFORE YOU CONCLUDE THAT YOUR SPOUSE IS LAZY

I already had a long-running debate with the Holy Spirit about marrying Irewamiri. I already had enough head knowledge as her pastor to place her in a box. I saw her skip services. I knew she did not like anything ministry. She was not even baptised in the Holy Ghost like some of us. To crown it all, we were […]

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0 2 min read
May 13, 2022

ONE QUESTION THAT CAN REVEAL A VISIONLESS SPOUSE

The fact that I was pastoring full time and resided in a place unknown to some of my prospective in-laws raised many concerns. It was a red flag for them. I did not have an easy ride to marriage. One of her elder brothers eventually agreed to see me. We met in a restaurant in one of the high brow […]

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0 2 min read
May 11, 2022

FAVOUR IS NOT JUST ABOUT YOUR WEDDING; IT IS ABOUT YOUR MARRIAGE

A young family was spending some time with us that morning, and we got into a conversation about their home. As we were about to end the conversation, I had a prompt to say to them, “The favour you enjoyed was not because you wanted to get married. People were not giving you gifts because it was your wedding day. […]

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0 2 min read
May 10, 2022

OUR SEX LIFE AS A COUPLE IS A MESS. CAN WE WATCH PORNOGRAPHY?

A young couple was spending some time with us. While interacting with them, we began to probe and ask questions about their union and especially their sexual bond as a young couple. We shared tips and educated them about things that will help their sexual bond and the actual act itself. At one point, we mentioned that pornography was not […]

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0 2 min read
May 9, 2022

OUR PARENTS ARE INTRUDING IN OUR MARITAL SPACE; WHAT DO WE DO?

Some weeks after we had our first baby, I was still a few hours from the end of my working hours. Irewamiri called and asked me, “Darling, when are you coming home?” It was an unusual call. I could sense the tension in her voice. She must have been under pressure. I asked if all was well. She tried to […]

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0 2 min read
May 8, 2022

BE YOUR SPOUSE’S GREATEST CHEERLEADER

Some years ago, we had a very faulty generator and terrible power supply in the area we lived. One night, some minutes right after the generator repairer left, the generator shut down – it was a season of physical heat, but it was also a season of marital heat. Irewamiri got tired of the situation and of my pastoral response […]

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0 2 min read
May 7, 2022

YOUR MARRIAGE, YOUR PHONE, AND YOUR SPOUSE’S PHONE (2)

We had to step into a marital situation that was degenerating. By the time we got to ask questions, we had realised that it was a phone issue. It was shocking how a simple issue can fester to become so gangrenous. The husband insisted that his wife could not and must not touch his phone. He said he does not […]

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0 2 min read
May 6, 2022

YOUR MARRIAGE, YOUR PHONE, AND YOUR SPOUSE’S PHONE (1)

Two of my friends planned to have a time-out. They had booked a dinner at a restaurant. They wanted to spend time with each other. Interestingly, right after placing their order, they began to press their phones. Then it occurred to them that instead of spending time with one another, they were pressing their phones. They decided to categorise their […]

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0 1 min read

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