When I noticed that my heart was drawn towards the young lady in my church and I perceived she would be my wife, I went to my spiritual father to inform him.
His counsel remains timeless and I can never forget:
“First, be sure you heard God. Second, Do not marry a woman who does not believe in God’s vision for your life or else you will be frustrated for the rest of your life”.
Before marriage, against all odds, we spent a night with himself and his wife. It was tough, challenging, exciting and we learnt a lot that still shapes our marriage till now.
We go through moments that we say things like, “Ah! This is what they were telling us then”. We still maintain that bond.
No matter how spiritual you are brother or sister, even if you are the anointed pastor of the prophetic apostolic evangelistic order, you need the guidance of spiritual parents.
The books you read are great but books will not call you by 11pm at night to warn you about a decision.
I know you counsel other people but have you heard of what we call “blind spots”?
I know a lot of people want to scream the “I can get it done by myself” mantra but do you want the truth? It is not wise.
I am a first hand example of being stubborn and trying to get your way for the first 2 years of pastoring. I was untrained. I could only give what I had. It still pains me.
But I am also a first hand example of aligning to spiritual parenting and guidance. I have no regrets. The difference is as clear as crystal.
Please, give your spiritual parents permission to be a part of your life. Do not be a part of a church where you cannot trust the pastor- you will frustrate both yourself and his work.
Give updates- academics, relationships, goals, challenges, business. Talk! Talk!! Talk!!!
It pains me a lot as a Pastor when I see people wait for a crisis before talking when a simple word of advice would have averted the trouble long before.
Do not make this mistake.