As we drove away from the place of the interview, I told Irewamiri that the singular most essential ingredient for a great marriage is training.

Once the Lord revealed to me that Irewamiri was the woman to marry, I knew I had to seek the counsel of my Spiritual Father. I sought an appointment with him. When I eventually saw him, he gave me a life-saving counsel that positioned me to make great decisions about marriage. 

If you are a child of God, do not live your life without submission to godly authority. It is God’s divine agenda to set you in a family. 

God sets the solitary in families; He brings out those who are bound into prosperity, But the rebellious dwell in a dry land.

Psalms 68:6 NKJV

The blessing of a family comes with godly counsel when it is needed. When you are under authority, it helps to shape your life responsibly. It takes an accountable man also to be responsible. 

Marriage is not a secret cult. Proposals and courtship should not look like cult meetings. You should carry your pastor along. Anyone who wants to hide that he or she is relating with you has a secret agenda.

The problem of Samson started when he started hiding things from those who could hold him accountable. He killed a lion and took honey out of it but kept it a secret. 

Rebellion never ends well. The Psalmist said that the rebellious will dwell in a dry land. Some people discountenanced this counsel before marriage and are now running to pastors after marriage. 

When you are well-trained, you become prepared for what is coming. 

Many people marry because they are in love, but they end up managing crisis because they are not trained.

It is a burden that we study in school for years to become a doctor, we keep studying to remain a good doctor; we spend money to become lawyers, and we invest in knowledge to remain sharp and on point, but unfortunately, we think marriage can be governed by the magic of love alone.

You did not become a doctor simply because you love medicine. You submitted to training also.

To become a great doctor, you work with seniors in the profession- you understudy them. But we think we are independent once we get married- we go on without mentors and teachers.

Friends, there have been times in our marital journey when the counsel of a mentor has saved us from crisis. It was a father and teacher who told me, “No matter the conflict, keep the emotional warmth of your home.”

So we were disagreeing that day, but I kept saying to my wife all through that, “I love you.” I kept hugging her even when she was cold. My lighted coal eventually lighted hers.

Marriage is not a child’s play. Mentors train us about sex, finance, communication, conflict management, etc.

Even if you are a pastor, you need a pastor and a trainer!

The disciples were obeying the instructions of Jesus, but they did not leave Jesus behind. 

On the same day, when evening had come, He said to them, “Let us cross over to the other side.” Now when they had left the multitude, they took Him along in the boat as He was. And other little boats were also with Him.

Mark 4:35 – 36 NKJV

When the storm hit on the trip, they had Jesus with them to calm the storm. 

And a great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat so that it was already filling. Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, “Peace, be still!” And the wind ceased and there was a great calm.

Mark 4:37 ,  39 NKJV

If your marriage is attempting to break into pieces, kindly check what and who you carried along in the beginning. 

May your home be blessed.

©️ temilOluwa Ola, Eruwa.

There is love in sharing

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