My lovely wife was carrying our first baby. I travelled for about 48 hours out of town. When I returned, Irewamiri said, “Can you imagine your daughter?” (a reference to the baby in the womb)

I was inquisitive. She said “She had not been kicking for the past 48 hours. I tried all I could. I talked to her. I played music and nothing changed. But the moment you spoke now, the baby began to throw kicks”.

Beloved fathers, there is something that you must settle- Nothing, absolutely nothing can replace your presence. Your presence is worth more than rubies. You must be there to listen to your spouse and share moments with your kids.

Dear father, you must be there before conception declaring who you want the seed to be. You must be there to hear the first cry. Try all you can to see the first steps. Fathers must learn to go to meetings called in schools and not just send mothers. Fathers should be at Matriculation and Convocation ceremonies.

Fathers must be there to show the girls their first example of a real man so that their view of men would not be distorted. Be your daughter’s first ‘knight in shining armour’ and become your son’s ‘first coach’.

Show that a real man does not take advantage of a woman’s emotions. Show that a man returns home early and stands by his wife. Show your son that there is nothing wrong with a man cooking meals or fixing laundries.

Show your son that real men decide the warmth of their marriage. Let them see you fight for the warmth of your marriage spiritually and at the same time see you hug your wife right after a conflict.

Show your seeds that you may not be perfect but you appreciate process and growth. Let them be a part of the journey. Show them how to make smart decisions with their time, money and their friendships.

The summary of your role is not just the 5 letter word called “Money”. Your fatherly role is deeper than a pocket. Buy presents but do not deny your home your presence.

Dear Father, when you are ‘broke’, you don’t have to become a terrorist. They do not have to walk on eggshells around you. Your family must be more of a priority when times are hard.

Do not run from home because there is no money. That is your opportunity to show them that you can hold a conversation when things are tough. Weak men seek solace by escaping into drinking but strong men have conversations. Let them see you smile when there is a downturn. Let them see you laugh in tough times.

You are Father. Make sure you are never far!

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